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I CAN HELP WITH ...
EXAMPLES OF THERAPY
FOUR POSITIVE PROGRAMMES
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COGNITIVE HYPNOTHERAPY offers friendly support and effective change

Modern neuroscience shows that the unconscious controls 90 per cent of our behaviour, so if you have emotions or behaviours that don't respond to your conscious efforts to change or control them, "updating" your unconscious could help.

I can guide you to build unconscious patterns of mind that can get you more of what you want, whether that's confidence, better communication, pain control or, more generally, to be able to improve your relationships or achieve your goals.



I CAN HELP WITH ...

BUILDING POSITIVE EMOTIONS AND THOUGHTS
You may wish to have more of some positive emotion (like confidence, self-esteem, focus, motivation).

OVERCOMING NEGATIVE FEELINGS
There may a negative feeling blocking your life that you would like to lessen or remove (e.g. anxiety, fear, pain, grief, jealousy).

LETTING GO OF HABITS
It may be that there's a behaviour you find yourself unable to let go of (for example smoking, over-eating, nail-biting, insomnia).

PHYSICAL CHALLENGES
You may have some physical challenge such as pain, IBS, eczema, or psoriasis which with a more positive mind-set you could control or lessen (you could ask yourself how much of a part stress plays in its severity). Cognitive Hypnotherapy can also prepare patients to experience surgical procedures.



SOME EXAMPLES OF HOW SOLUTIONS CAN BE REACHED.
NB everyone's different. The following examples are intended to illustrate my approach.


TO BREAK FREE OF A PHOBIA

Supposing you have an overwhelming fear of spiders, the first thing we could do together is to discover when this response was learned in the past and to have you realise how you could instead have developed a way of coping with spiders that wouldn't develop into an unhelpful emotion. (NB it isn't about having to LOVE spiders - or heights or birds or any other fear - just coping with them in a way that doesn't interfere with your life!). We could then check the benefits you experience from the new learning, just by testing out spider-situations in your imagination (again NB) only. No creatures are ever present in the office, nor need they be! If your perception is still more negative than is right for you, for example, if you were still bothered by their eyes, I could guide you to see how very small their eyes are and how they are only interested in spotting the next fly. I would also give you psychological tools to build your confidence in how you can be at ease around spiders in the future.

When I was a hypnotherapy student at the Quest Institute, we learned a great technique for eliminating phobias. One of my colleagues, who had a deep fear of spiders, was the demonstration subject. As Trevor Silvester, our teacher, talked about how he was going to work with her and spoke about spiders, my colleague showed us her arm: she'd come out in a rash, that's how severe her phobia was. Later, after a 20-minute demonstration and our lunch break, the rash had disappeared and she could quite happily hold and look into a plastic cup containing a spider..


TO INCREASE CONFIDENCE FOR INTERVIEWS (or presentations, meetings or exams)

You'd be amazed how many successful people come to me because they find it hard to speak out and/or present themselves confidently, often particularly in group or formal settings or with people perceived as superiors. As we work together, it's a pleasure to hear them reporting a growing inner confidence and ease. How can we achieve this? For many people there was a time in their past when a teacher or a parent said or did something, or used a particular tone or manner, and the young person unconsciously decided that staying quiet or keeping a low profile was a good idea. They may even have drawn some negative conclusion about themselves, such as "I always say the wrong thing because I'm stupid".

At this point it's important to point out that we never go looking for these incidents in order to allocate blame. It's about perceiving a situation in a different way: for instance a teacher who spoke harshly may have been afraid of losing control (i.e. he or she was the unconfident one!); or a parent who doesn't pay attention to a child's story may simply be preoccupied by trouble at work and doesn't mean to hurt the child's feelings. And even if the child told the story in an unclear way, or performed badly in a spelling test at school, it just means they haven't yet mastered these skills, they've got time to learn.

These or similar new ideas can release the negative emotion from the early incident and leave your mind clear for more positive learning of how you'd like to perform in interviews or meetings. Together we can rehearse you through future situations in a way that installs new confidence and relaxation in you. At this point people often surprise themselves by realising (and truly believing deep down) something like "Generally people want me to do well, and are interested in what I've got to say". Or "we're all in this together and it's ok to just be myself."

And they and I are delighted!


TO ACHIEVE CONTROL AND RELAXATION FOR CHILDBIRTH
(see www.confidentchildbirth.co.uk)


TO DEVELOP POSITIVE CONTROL OF EATING PATTERNS

If you have an issue with eating, I wonder what triggers it. Boredom? Frustration? Stress? Sheer habit? Different people have different eating patterns. Some were learned in the past and can be unlearned. Others need a change of beliefs (unhelpful beliefs could be "I need to eat to calm myself down", "I'm overweight anyway so I may as well just keep going") and some people just don't feel when their body is letting them know that it's had enough (so they keep eating to the point of nausea). The good news is that all of these beliefs and patterns can be changed by clearing out unhelpful stuff (technical term!) from the past, and building new skills such as listening to the body, relaxing when stressed or whatever is appropriate to your particular pattern. If you've tried umpteen diets and made endless resolutions but you're either stuck or yo-yoing, it can be worth "spring-cleaning" your attitude to food, emotions and your body for a long-lasting and sustainable solution.

These programmes are a means of taking positive action with supportive guidance.


SKILLS TO BUILD EXCELLENT HEALTH

The aim of this programme is for you to gain the frame of mind that you need in order to improve your health, and to have started down your new road towards better health.

During your four sessions we'll develop an achievable set of practical goals for you: clarifying for you your ultimate target and the steps you can take to get there.

We'll make this goal vividly appealing and attractive to you.

We'll highlight the skills and capabilities you already have and how you can use them in the arena of health; and build further skills (maybe focus, motivation or calm) that you need more of.

If any situations have been a health challenge for you till now, you'll be guided in how to meet those challenges positively (situations could be: the slump on the sofa after work rather than go to the gym; your mother-in-law pressing another slice of cake on you; your habit of raising your blood pressure when you're furious with a particularly annoying colleague or the way that you continue to file your GP's advice under "Think About Later").

Finally we'll make sure that your new activities and the way you go about doing them become an integral part of who you are, so that you naturally continue them way into the future; instead of some annoying extraneous duty that you resent and at best do grudgingly.

Please note that THIS PROGRAMME CAN BE ADAPTED FOR GROUPS IN A COMPANY SETTING. It can also be extended to include monthly "top-ups" to keep you on the path.


CONFIDENCE FOR PRESENTATIONS, MEETINGS AND INTERVIEWS

Have you been to a workshop where the trainer advises you how to walk to a lectern, arrange your notes and the angle at which you should hold your head? If not, you're lucky. They do exist; my clients have told me about them. This is not like that, because you know much more than I do about the culture of your company or the workplace that you're applying to join. You may have lecterns or you may be more likely to be lounging on comfy chairs and using first names with senior executives. These settings can be equally intimidating in different ways if you're one of the several million Britons who are terrified of public speaking.

In this four-session programme, I'll teach you a set of positive skills so that you can overcome your nerves. The exact skill-mix will vary according to your needs - it could include calm, confidence, relaxation, positive planning and communication. One of my clients decided he needed to learn how to use his sense of humour in meetings, and as soon as he did, he could relax. But this may not be appropriate in all settings - you're the judge of that.

By coming on the programme, you'll have the opportunity to change your perception of presentations, meetings and/or interviews in a supportive and confidential setting. By the end, you should be able to communicate in the way that's right for you.


CREATE YOUR FUTURE

Are you blocked? Do you know where you're going? Do you have vague dreams of a different future but no idea of how to realise them? Or just a feeling of dissatisfaction with the present and an inkling that change is overdue?

This four-session programme is for you.

Together we'll clarify what's right for you and exactly how you can go about putting it into place. Depending on how much you already know of what you want to move towards, this may involve looking at your past to see your moments of achievement and fulfilment.

We'll set attractive and achievable goals for you and have you begin to take the first steps.

If you need extra skills such as the focus to see you through a day of determined action, we'll develop it; or maybe you need the confidence to approach potential business partners - again we'll build that in you.

Between sessions you'll do agreed tasks that are steps towards what you want, and as you report back, we'll identify further positive building to strengthen you so that your future becomes reality.

We'll find positive routes to overcome any obstacles so that by the end you're well on the way.

This programme can be extended to include monthly "check-ins" to keep you on course.


BETTER RELATIONSHIPS

Oh what a minefield! So often we struggle along, our minds full of "why doesn't he just.?" or "she doesn't understand." and "if only he/she would .., we could be so happy."

I'm sure you can fill in the blanks.

The good news is that it doesn't have to this way. When we stop subjecting our partners to critical scrutiny or resentful demands for change and start thinking differently about what it means to relate to someone else, things really can improve.

And if you're currently single, congratulations, you've got an opportunity to avoid a load of heartache and prepare yourself positively for next time.

In the programme, we look at the art and skill of communicating with others and how to get out of sessions of complaint or criticism, whether we've been giving or receiving it. You can look forward to fewer rows!

You'll learn a new way of thinking about your current or future partner that can increase mutual respect.

We'll build the inner skills that support you in all this: they may be confidence, calm, relaxation, humour or any combination!

And you'll discover what's really important to you and how to get more of it (it may be trust, friendship, excitement - everybody's different).

Please do get in touch to discuss how I might help you. I'm happy to answer any question you may have. You're likely to get my voicemail, but if you leave a message letting me know good times to ring you back, I'll call you as soon as possible.